Sunday, November 15, 2009

A Day

I might have missed something, but for some reason I don't completely get, over the past year I have shifted radically from a colourful brat, emanating Energy and loudness, to a very sober advocate of discreetness and lover of the Santosha life. Might have been Enlightenment.

Today is a day I cherished in every way and second, and two years ago, I'd want to commit suicide for pushing myself through it. I woke up much later than usual, and spent a long time cuddling in bed with my husband. By the time I got up, I wasted the little time I had left before lunch doing absolutely nothing interesting in the Internet. Then I ate, did a few things I wanted to do for a quite some days now (cleaned the glass-ceramic, placed an ad to give away a CD rack we don't want anymore, studied a little German) but wasn't able to, and went to teach an EFL class--yeah, but I'm not even mad that I have to "work" on Sundays. This student is a joy. Then I came back home, had a lovely warm shower and had dinner. All very slow, very low-key and very peaceful.

Then, at times during a day spent mostly on a high, pleasant vibration, I worried again about my teaching gig with the retired people. I'm going to ask my coordinator for a method on Wednesday, and there's the student who had offered to get the methods for me free of charge. I hate to go through that drama. My husband says it's a feeling of cowardice I have, but I disagree. I was feeling really good about this job until I realised I would need some planning, some structure to ground on and not feel so pressured to "be imaginative".

But I don't want that to ruin the following days, like it has made last week hell-like. I will watch one of my Pink Panther DVDs now, go to bed not too late and wake up cheerfully to a seemingly boring Monday.

Life can be very pretty after you begin manipulating Time.