Monday, September 26, 2011

Function of Time #5: Energy

Before rythmn comes Energy.

It took me a while to realise that. I fell prey to my old fantasy of time shortage for a long time. I fret over age, I resented time-consuming responsibilities, I cut down on comfort, I walked the cutting edge. All to save time I realise now I have never even used. Now I have decided to let go of this imaginary fear, and go back to 9-to-6'ing.

It sucks for a large part, but I also benefit a lot from it: a stable income will allow me to explore in depth aspects of my Passion, a regular routine will give me structure and support for leaping and launching rockets of desire, building a career will let me reward those who help me and light up my fuse. And more.

The other side to that is that it really sucked up most of my stamina in this beginning. I work in a well-concealed hide-out way up North everyday, and after getting home from the long ride with connections I felt exhausted and wanted little more than having dinner and collapsing in bed to feel less sleepy at the office the next day.

But tonight the feeling has changed. Maybe it's just temporary excitement about my German class beginning tomorrow in the evening after work, but I'm really eager to use my evenings now. Way more than in my old life, before I got back to day-jobbing. I want to get back to making Music, be finally serious with Mandarin, astral-travel, queer-tango, cook. And go back to blogging about The Fine Art of Time Manipulation.

I have realised this job has energised me. And if I have Energy, I have plenty of Time. In that feeling, I am Eternity.

All I have to do now is feel the beat, and put a natural rythmn to this song. I'm sorry I missed this important one beat and did not wish a merry Equinox to all my friends all over the World this season. Many blessings of Light and Dark, of up and downbeat. Life would be terribly boring and meaningless without them.